The Dreams of Jennifer Doalfer

Orgasms...

2009-11-25T15:39:00.002+01:00

Perhaps not a politically correct topic in an open blog, but I am risking it anyway.

As some of my readers will have noticed I have an inquisitive mind and often wonder about aspects of the sexual encounters. One thing that I have come to speculated about recently is the way a girl orgasms. I have not until recently had much experienced with other girls orgasms (and don't ask my why that might be case now - that is not presently for disclosure). Guys on the other hand I have some experiences with, but that is all quite straight forward. A build up, different degrees of groaning, a point of no return, spasms and ejaculation followed by an almost universal lack of erection and then relaxation.

But with girls it seems different. Ranging from almost unnoticeable to major convulsions. In my own case I have a long slow build up, very distinct spasms increasing in frequency and intensity until overcome by uncontrollable shaking lasting from a few seconds to up to ten seconds followed by slow aftershakes. Absolutely no way I could hide what is happening to me. I know some girls cannot stand any further touching after that, whereas if I force myself to continue past a short unpleasant moment, I can continue and come again several times.

One of the girls I have been able to observe at close hands explodes with almost no warning, tenses into a foetal position which she cannot get out of for quite some time and certainly wants no further action for a while, whereas another one I knew from earlier in my life broke out in tears when it happened, but that was the only way that you could tell what had happened and she could quite happily let a guy continue past her orgasm with no sensitivity to further touching.

I am wondering why these orgasms are so different. I guess the orgasms are natures way of providing a "carrot" to make us have sex, possibly the spasms aid the movement of the sperm. But in both cases it should theoretically be the same for all.

Are there any of my readers out there who have some thoughts on this subject?

Clothes I wear at parties and other public places

2009-11-21T11:54:00.002+01:00

I have just read a message from one of my readers who commented on Copenhagen being one of the places in the world where you could spot most girls at public places (Nyhavn and Cafe Victor were mentioned) with no panties or with provocative clothes.

I can't really tell, because I do not have the experience of many other places in the world, but there certainly is some truth in this. Not so much from the younger generations, but perhaps from 30 and upwards. I know several ladies, not exactly friends but close enough for such discussions to take place, who brag to their girlfriends about their encounters and how they dress up, often with no underwear, when they go out.

I have often gone without underwear to parties and to a night out with friends. It is not all that often that the lack of panties have been noticed, but when it does happen it really gets me excited. It is not often that people actually see the lack of panties (at least not mine) at public places like Nyhavn, but accidentally when getting in and out of cars or even better when dancing and the guys let their hands wander over your bum and feel the unencumbered buttocks under the dress.

I find it much easier and slightly less private to dress so that my tits are on display if not careful - which I then can make sure I am not when it suits me. It is much easier for a guy to fondle your tits under a lose top and have some fun out of that, than it is for a guy to actually get a hand up your legs and play with you.

We have become very good friends with a couple we go out with. Both the guys gets excited from their wives dressing daringly in public and will happily assist in creating situations where we can be on display. We let the guys chose the dresses (but often have to restrain them as their wishes easily get out of hand) and then enjoy an evening out showing off. One of those dresses are quite open at the front, and will split open showing bare legs at the top of the stockings, and if I am not careful even more than that. Getting into the seat at a theatre passing the people already sitting down (they don't always stand as they ought to) or getting into a sofa at a party or even at a discotheque will all depending on how brave I am show that I am not wearing panties.

But I am certain that doesn't only happen in Copenhagen.

Hugs Jen

What Women Want

2009-01-27T17:01:00.002+01:00

My blog reader Bill posted a comment to "Dares That I Do" which I thought I would bring to the front. You can read his blog comment for the whole text, but basically he asks me to read an article he is linking to from the New York Times, and to comment on how that corresponds with my own feelings.

You should really read the article before my comment.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/25/magazine/25desire-t.html

First I would like to say that in answering that, I will be stepping onto very thin ice and may very well get some people very upset. Please believe me when I say that if you think so, you haven't understood what I am trying to say. I am only being analytical around some border areas that need to be investigated in order to be fully understood.

My first comment is on the rape fantasies. I have assisted one of my good friends in dealing with rape victims, so I do have some experience. One of the things often suppressed by the papers or media, either because of decency or lack of information on such matters, is that the victims have deep feelings of shame because they found that they actually lubricated and in some cases even had an orgasm. You can imagine what that does to a victim. "Did I entice? Was it my own fault? How could my body react like that, when I was so frightened and disgusted? What kind of a person am I? My response has always been the same as what the article described (that it is not because the victim wanted it), but my explanation is another one. I don't think the body reacts to protect, I think it is a basic reaction from the time when we were monkeys and didn't have fixed sexual partners, but where the procreation happened by any male forcing themselves on any available woman. Possibly for protection, but certainly for procreation the woman needed to lubricate, and possibly for the same reasons also achieve orgasm in order to be a willing participant at the next encounter. That we still react like that only shows how fast our society has developed in the last couple of thousand years, which in the development of our species is like the punctuation at the end of a 1000 page book. So no rape victim need to feel the least guilty. The guilty ones are the sick bastards perpetrating such a vile crime.

But, having said that - and here comes the thin ice - some woman experiment willingly with encounters which closely resembles real rape, and that is where the "fantasies" come into it. I admit to being one of those. A fantasy of mine would be where a friend of mine, as part of our game, ties me up naked in a revealing position, and for whatever reason leaves me for instance at the mercy of other guests at a party. Even though those other guests know it is wrong to take me against my will, their desire for me when they see me like that overshadows their ability to restrain themselves. Such a fantasy is very much like the one the article describes, where women dream of being so desirable that men just can't resist them.

In real life there would be a lot of reason for not letting yourself into a situation like that, ranging from HIV, physical danger to the problem of facing those "friends" again at another time. But people happily play role plays where they can live out the dreams. Unfortunately the border line between role plays and real situations can be difficult to detect. Like one of the victims who had an encounter very much resembling my fantasy. She was at a party and did let a friend tie her up at a time when she was drunk and aroused, only to find out he was "selling" her to a select few of his friends who had sex with her afterwards. Despite what we told her about this being rape, she didn't want to press charges, because she said it was her own fault for letting herself be tied up in the first place. Also, she admitted to having felt very aroused and not objected when the first "non-consentual" sex took place. It was only as it continued she got frightened and starting feeling abused.

This shows how close a fantasy (mine) can be to a real situation going bad. If you want to play like that you have to have a friend you trust 100% to be there and stop it when it crosses some border you have agreed in advance. But again - the safer you are the less of an excitement to those thriving on such adventures. If it goes over the line - do you call the cops? I guess not.

All this is of course totally different form the woman being pulled off her bike and raped behind the bushes somewhere. No doubt there - but even then some people lubricate and feel shame for it afterwards. Aren't we funny creatures?

In the article it is said that "I hammer home with my students, ‘Arousal is not consent.’ " And you have to hammer that home again and again to stop the sick bastards who gets it wrong. BUT.... How many girls haven't the next day regretted a sexual encounter she had had the night before when a little drunk and aroused by close dancing and a good atmosphere. Was consent ever explicitly stated? Or did the situation just escalate? Was it then rape? Of course not, but to a guy that is very close to a situation where it might be, if the girl claims more than just regret. When I was a young girl a contract circulated as joke. It was a piece of paper the girl had to sign before going to bed with a guy, so he wouldn't get in trouble afterwards. Not really a joke any more - perhaps that should be re-introduced.

I guess this response to the article was not what Bill had in mind, but it was my first reaction. Let me try and see if I can come up with a different reaction...

The article deals with the feelings of men and women. How the heterosexual men only gets aroused by women, and admits to that, whereas the woman gets aroused by both sexes and do not admit to that. Firstly I can't comment on the guys.You need to be one or have done the studies ;-) Secondly, yes I would get aroused by both sexes, but I would probably as opposed to my sister study subjects have admitted that as well. But that is because I am me, and much more willing to admit to my feelings. And no, in case you should ask, the moneys don't do anything for me ;-) At least I don't think so. I would be very surprised if a study would show it did.

It would be really interesting to run this test on some of my friends who insists they have totally straight and normal sex lives, and see what is really going on beneath the surfaces.

But I think it is true that women get aroused on a wider array of possibilities than men. Men perhaps gets more readily and visible excited and therefore cannot hide what excites them, and for that reason have developed a need to not be aroused by what is seen as not acceptable,where as women can better "hide" that she gets excited and lie about it.

The article seems to dwell on lust. Many women seem to loose that once married and in stable relationships, until suddenly something sparks it again. You see women who have let themselves get fat and sloppy, get divorced for only then go to the gym, wear nice clothes and make-up, use the settlement money for a sports car, go all the right places, discuss fucking with her soulmates, all in the same situation, for then to find the right one, and slip back into being fat and sloppy. Is the lust only something used to make the women want to attract the right man?

In that case I am an abnormality. I think "lust" all the time, and will go out of my way to orchestra situations where I can find relief for that. And I haven't gone fat or sloppy and have no intention to. Why not have a good and comfortable marriage and at the same time retain the sexual drive? I think those of us who can balance that right are very few.

It was a very good and thought provoking article. I am surprised a large newspaper had the nerve to write that in "God's Own Country", but there you are.

Dares I do.

2009-01-08T13:49:00.002+01:00

It was really nice to see the positive feedback I got from posting just one more message on my blog. It kind of rekindled the interest in writing. Unfortunately, the conditions are still the same - I simply don't have the time for the long stories. But I thought I might get back to the topic "Games I play" and just do small blog entries explaining some of the more interesting (at least from my point of view) exposures.

The games are usually better played in the summer, when it is easier to go around with relatively little clothes on. For the last two years that we have had the flat in Spain, I have enjoyed the freedom down there to play around, first a bit innocently, but as it always are with these things, once you get going you want more and more, and before long you are doing things you wouldn't have dreamt of doing in the beginning.

Another interesting aspect is that it is so much easier to be tempted into doing something of an exhibitionistic nature when you are prompted by somebody else. It is a little bit like the fact that you do this because you are "ordered" to do it adds to the excitement.

Over the years I have been communicating with a couple of readers who have been prompting me to do things. Some of them definitely way beyond what I would normally be doing, but perhaps for that reason, so much more exhilarating.

So let me begin by explaining one of the first more innocent dares I carried through with. But I have to warn you first, that these will not be long erotic fantasies. Rather it will be explaining how I did it and perhaps a bit of what I was feeling. But I will not put it into story form with dialogue, build up of the excitement etc. You will have to add that yourself in your mental image of the situation.

Since I had been writing about wearing short dresses and accidental exposure, one of my readers gave me the dare to within 48 hours to go and sit at a bar or restaurant, wearing no underwear and letting my exposed pussy be seen.

Just getting a dare like that and thinking about it got my juices flowing. I started to think about how this could be fabricated in a way which really seemed "accidental". I wasn't going to go and sit at a sidewalk bar with my dress riding so far up that my pussy was on display to everybody passing by. So careful planning was the key. Fortunately I had 48 hours to plan it.

Quickly I understood the best way would be in connection with the morning swim I had on days when I didn't have to be at the hospital early. I would normally go to the beach, swim, put on my loose summer dress and change under that. But now I was thinking how I could adapt that routine.

There was a nice beach restaurant a bit further away from where I normally swam. It was right down to the beach, a bit elevated (about 5 - 6 feet) so you could sit and watch the beach and swimmers from the edge. With about 50 meters to the edge of the water, there was a good bit of sand, and later in the day the place got really crowded, but early in the morning there were only a few regular guests.

What I ended up doing was the following:

I put on my normal swimming outfit. It is not a very exciting thong outfit but a sensible swim suit for serious swimming. Then I wrapped my Kenyan kanga around me, put a towel, hairbrush and a book into a wicker basket and went off to the beach. I went right to the back of the cafe, parked my scooter and made it around to the front, saying hi to the waiters and the few regulars as I walked past and then proceeded to the beach. I could already feel everybody's eyes on me. I went to about halfway between the cafe and the water where the sand was still dry, dropped the kanga and went for the swim. Nothing unusual there. But coming back I dried myself with the towel, then turned my back to the onlookers while I took off the swimsuit, presenting the back of my naked body to the onlookers. Then I wrapped the kanga around me and tied it up.

I don't know if you know the kanga? It is just one large piece of material. Normally you hold it up in front of you, wrap the sides around you, crossing at the back and then to the front, tying it behind you neck. But the good thing about a kanga is that you can actually do as you like! I put mine around the back first, crossed it at the front and tied it up. In that way it fell closed at front, covering you up, but the split was up the front.

Now, if you were a male sitting at the café, would you not be looking at a lone lady swimming at the beach, stripping naked and then putting on a dress, with obviously nothing on underneath? Well, that is what I figured.

What I had noticed earlier was that the waiters when they took time off to smoke would go to the sandy bit in front of the restaurant. One of the reasons I liked this restaurant was a no-smoking policy anywhere on the premises. Normally you could smoke outside, but here you couldn't even smoke on the terrace.

So, placing myself at the outer table so I could look out over the water, I knew that people standing on the beach right down in front would have an opportunity to be able to look in under the tables and as such look at my legs.

I ordered a coffee, getting very swift attention by the waiter, and once that arrived I got my book out, lent a bit back while crossing my legs. I knew that doing so, would make the kanga split, so when I later would uncross my legs it would be wide open if I didn't pull it closed, which was exactly what I intended not doing.

Now it was just a question of waiting to the first smoking break. I didn't have to wait long. I guess they were eager to go to the beach and see how much of me they would be able to see from there.

Looking over the top of my book through my dark sunglasses I could see them milling around down in front, obviously looking up my way, not even trying to hide it. They probably thought I was reading not thinking about them.

I knew I had to do this. Not that I didn't want to. I had planned so well that it obviously wasn't me exhibiting myself, but it would be them spying on me. But I know the feeling I get, when people are looking at me under such circumstances. I would just have to concentrate on being totally cool and not get carried away.

So, when I slowly, to let them know something was going on, uncrossed my legs and just let them rest lightly open, I knew perfectly well what a perfectly clear and unobstructed view they would have of my exposed pussy. It wasn't even a question of just being able to look up under a dress. The kanga had actually split all the way up to my waist.

I know that the fact that a girl has a shaved pussy is an extra come on for the guys. But what happens to me when I get excited is that my vaginal lips starts swelling and tuning a glistering red. I don't know how obvious it is but I know my clit grows till it extends beyond the inner lips. In other words if you are close enough you will be in no doubt that I am getting aroused. That is the embarrassing bit, which is also so exciting. I can sit here and pretend not being aware what is going on, but I probably cannot hide my excited state. And if that doesn't get the guys turned on I don't know what will.

At one point I took a sip of the coffee looking down at the guys. They all turned away as if one body acting in unison. I sat back again, crossed my legs the other way (Yes - a Sharon Stone move), and pulled the kanga down. I think perhaps I had sat exposed for no more than two minutes. But certainly enough to fulfil the dare. Soon after the guys came back up again, laughing and sending surreptitious looks my way. I stayed perhaps another 15 minutes then got up, paid at the bar and left.

As an added benefit I had the exciting, but unplanned experience, of getting on my scooter and driving off with no underwear on. Now that just simply is not possible to do decently, but I couldn't stand there at the back changing. So I had to accept driving the first couple of hundred meters with the pussy on display again. Not a problem as there were nobody there, but it just added to the excitement of the situation. But as soon as I came to a denser part of the wood I drove down a small path until out of sight I could strip naked and change into my still wet swimsuit and fasten the kanga in a more decent way again.

Back home again, I got some much deserved relief and went straight on to sending a reply to my reader that I had indeed complied and won the dare.

New Year Evening 08-09

2009-01-01T20:23:00.002+01:00

I haven’t written anything for a long time, and this is not the beginning of a new productive era. However, I had a very nice and exciting experience this New Year night, which I thought I would share with you.

The wife of the couple we were supposed to be with this New Year got ill just the day before the party. Most of the other of our friends got invited instead by another couple to whom we were too peripheral to be invited as well. Not being able to think of anything else to do we just decided to have a nice evening in by ourselves.

As my regular readers might remember Poul, my husband, likes to buy underwear for me. Normally he will not buy my a bra as he wants me to go without, but he also realizes that my breasts are getting a bit looser and as such wobble a bit too much for comport or decency when worn under lose evening dresses.

Instead he had produced in the Santa stockings a very nice set of half bra and crotchless tights. The half bra was black lace supporting the breasts to just under the nipples, lifting them up so they strutted out really prominently. The tights were the same lace, but totally open at the crotch leaving front and back totally exposed. Seeing we were going to be alone I accepted wearing that under my black dress, even though the top of the dress easily opened enough to expose the breasts and the split up the front on the dress only stopped a hand’s width from the open part.

Poul loved the way I looked, and took several pictures of me with the dress opening up exposing me both when preparing the dinner and as we ate in the candlelight. We both got quite drunk and not a little horny, planning to slip early to bed after the bells for some much needed sex.

However, just before midnight all the friends from the other party arrived at our house. The hosts had heard about us, and felt sorry for us not being invited. They had tried to call us, but our phones were on silent, so instead they had all piled into a couple of taxis, brought bags of booze, cakes, mixers etc. and a good portion of high and drunken spirit.

Probably about 2 AM I found myself at the table nibbling to the bids of food that were left over, joining into a discussion on sexy underwear. Generally the feeling was that New Year and company Christmas Parties were the place to air such garments. I did express agreement – how could I not, seeing what I was wearing. When confronted with a direct question I had to admit I had regularly gone to parties with no underwear. A couple of the other girls also admitted to this, and the guys were getting rather direct and lewd as the discussion progressed.

At one point I felt a tab on my shoulder, and Jens who sat right next to me asked,
“Is this conversation getting you excited”?

Now Jens is a very nice guy. A good deal older than me, probably late fifties, somewhat overweight and diabetic, and in my books not really one of the usual sex hungry guys milling around me at parties. So I was actually a bit surprised with his direct question.

“I guess I have to admit that”, I said, “but why do you ask”?

“Because I can see right down your dress and your nipples got harder as we talked”, he whispered in my ear.

The usual girl reaction was to immediately put a hand on the front of the dress pressing it in to your body so it didn’t hang lose exposing you. That was exactly what I involuntarily did.

“Don’t”, he whispered as he moved my hand away. The dress dropped open again, and I knew he could again look straight at my exposed and, I could feel, now even harder nipples.

When these things happen I go all soft in the knees, my belly does a funny flop and I start getting wet between the legs. Knowing that a guy is looking at me, and I just sit there letting it happen really gets me going.

The conversation was droning in the background as I felt strangely detached, only being able to concentrate on his gaze down my front. When his hand touched my leg and in one swift but hardly noticeable move reached my inner thigh, I gasped, but didn’t stop him. I seemed like he just lingered there for a second to test my reaction, and as he found none he continued all the way up, hitting the exposed skin, the outer labia to quickly and efficiently land right at my clit. I jumped a little and came to my senses.

“Jens, No. Can’t do that here, you naughty boy,” I whispered as I as unnoticeable as possible tried to pry away his hand. But as I lent over towards him to whisper this in his ear, his fingers dug into me. The feeling was so great, I didn’t want to stop him. But I guess he understood that perhaps this was really not the best time or place, because he moved his hand away. I kept looking at him, as he took his glass and moved it to his lips, but in the process managed to put his fingers that has just been inside me into his mouth, licking them, tasting my juices.

“I guess this has got you excited then”, he said in a low voice.

“I am sorry”, I said, not really knowing what it was I was sorry about, but I felt I ought to feel bad about it in one way or another.

“Don’t be sorry. I think it is so lovely when a woman exposes herself like that. Not only exposes part of the body, but also exposes her desires. I am just sorry I can’t any longer take properly part in the act. The diabetes has hit my libido; I can’t seem to get it up these days, not even with the help of Viagra or the likes. But I still love to see women letting go as you just did”.

“I don’t know what went into me there. I should normally have stopped you much earlier”, I said to him.

“Well, what went into you was a need for some attention of the right kind. Perhaps I can offer that at some time”?

I didn’t quite know what he had in mind, so I just politely hummed an acknowledgement. I guess perhaps I did need some attention.

About 20 minutes later, I was coming down the back stairs when I bumped into him again. It was quite dark, with only a couple of candles lighting up the stairways. The back stairs are kind of narrow and steep, so the way down was completely blocked by his larger than normal corpus. I guess he had perhaps come to look for me, heard me come down and just waited for me.

Being alone with him now I felt very conscious of our previous encounter. I didn’t know what to say, and as I stood there I started to feel the excitement grow again. I don’t know what attention he had in mind, but suddenly I didn’t mind finding out.

The way we stood on the steep stairs his head was below my shoulders. I put a hand on his shoulder, maybe subconsciously relaxing and giving him the go ahead. He certainly took it like that. He moved his hands up to my dress front, separated the two sides and pulled them down over my shoulders exposing my breasts. As the colder air hit the nipples they exploded, I shuddered and felt the same whoosh, getting wet and not caring what happened. His fingers found the nipples, squeezed them and rolled them between his fingers. Then he put one in his mouth, sucked it so I started to moan.

What I found so nice about this experience that I wanted to write about it, was the fact that I knew he didn’t have any mutual sex in mind. He was really bent on satisfying me, knowing how aroused I was. That meant I could totally let go and let him concentrate on giving me some “attention”.

I bent over a bit, my mouth close to his ear.

“I think I could do with some of that attention now”, I whispered.

He didn’t reply, but I felt his hand sliding up my leg, again finding the clit in one smooth move. I gasped and leant against him.

“No, move back,” he said. “I want to be able to watch those incredible tits of yours”.

And I wanted him to see me. I put my arms around my back and undid the bra, slipping it over my arms. I could hear his breathing get heavy.

“Oh Jen”, he gasped. “That is so beautiful. Just because I can’t get it up, doesn’t mean I can’t get aroused. I have been dreaming so many dirty dreams about you, but never for a second thought I would get to be with you in this way”.

He had put two fingers into me, rubbing hard at my g-point while the palm of his hand was working my clit. He was rough, hard and fast. In my excited state I would come quickly. Soon I felt the first warm small contractions, making it impossible to stand still. I was writhing in his arms. As I could feel the orgasm approaching I closed my eyes, and leant against him, clinging to his head, pressing it against my naked breasts.

“No”, he said. “Move back, I want to look at you. Don’t close your eyes. Keep looking at me as you come. I want to see the expression in your eyes as you climax”.

With the exhibitionistic sensation of a guy openly watching you climax under his administrations, I reached the explosion in less than 10 seconds. I looked at him throughout the initial spasms, as I started to loose control. I was shaking violently afraid to fall, but he had an arm around my back, the other inside me. There was no risk of me falling so I could just let go. My whole body convulsed in one of the strongest orgasms I had had in a long time. When I stopped shaking, our eyes finally broke contact. I can’t remember any guy looking so intensely at me through an orgasm. That was so arousing. Even now thinking back, I am experiencing the thrill of his eyes on me.

We didn’t say anything. He gave my breasts a small caress, kissed the nipples, like saying goodbye to them, helped me find the bra and made sure the dress was on properly before helping me down the remaining steps. Only then could I speak.

“Thank you. I really needed that. You did that so well”! I said to him.

“No it is me thanking you for letting me do it. I will never forget the look in your eyes as you came. The knowledge that you let me do that, while I was watching you, is just incredible”, he said as he gave my bum a loving pat and let me walk ahead of him so it didn’t look like we entered the living room at the same time.

Poul and I have an agreement that we tell each other about any encounters. In that way at least we don’t have to have a bad conscience about lying to each other. Also we find that talking about the experiences we have arouses the other part. For some reason this situation really turned on Poul. I guess the idea of his wife being exposed like that to Jens, a very old and dear friend of his, was new to him. So the night ended with me having a real hard dick inside me anyway.

Hope you all had some good experiences as well on your New Year evening party.

Jenifer

Grinding to a halt...

2008-01-09T10:36:00.000+01:00

One of my readers asked if I had stopped writing. The answer is a mixture of yes and no. As you will obviously have seen, I am not writing for the time being, so the short term answer is yes. But it is not a conscious decision. I would like to write, and I do miss it. It is just that there are times when the real life gets in the way of my dreams, meaning that I don't have the time to write. When I don't have the time I also don't have the peace of mind to dream and play with sexual dreams and desires. The last couple of months I have gone through such a period. Spring and summer means outdoor life and lightly clad bodies etc. That is much better for the imagination and the actual sex life than this cold, wet and dark weather. However, some things are happening which is worth writing about at a later time, so no in the long term I have not stopped. Just have patience.

Last sentence just made be think of the old joke "Old doctors don't die, they just lose their patients".

Hugs Jen

Games I play

2007-09-13T10:44:00.000+02:00

As promised I will write a small blog when I do anything which gives me exhibitionist pleasure. I hope it invites to comments or serve as an inspiration.

The other day I had to be on a three and a half hour flight home. Having been a bit bored I was being inspired to do a bit of my exposure, but hadn't come across any real good opportunities. On the net I saw a picture of a girl sleeping on a plane with her breasts fallen out of her top, and that gave me an idea. I have a wrap around top, which is very open. So open in fact that you cannot wear it without some kind of a top under it. I have done that lots of times without it giving me any inspiration, but the picture was a bit of an eyeopener. Having thought about this for a day or two, I found a rather thin black tube top and some black thread which I sowed on the inside of the tube top, so that the fastening point was right under the breasts. I let the string trail down under the inside of the top fastening it to the belt hidden by the wrap around top. I tried sitting in my couch assuming a position I thought was similar to sitting in a plane, turning sideways pretending to be asleep, with my hands in my lap. Pulling the strings I could make the tube top slide down to reveal the nipple on the side where the wrap around blouse had fallen away from the breast due to the sideways position. The thought of sitting like that in the plane was highly arousing, I just hoped to find a suitable target for my little display.

Before departure I made sure to check in online so I could choose a position in the middle of the row on the left side of the plane, seeing that it always is the right side of the blouse that opens up the most (as that is the second flap to be closed, it is the one which opens most), so if I turned away from the aisle towards anybody sitting in the window seat, it should be easier to do my little act. As I always fly business class it is often business men next to me, so there was a good chance of a suitable target.

One the plane I was happy to see two guys in the seats next to me as I got in the plane as one of the last passengers. Putting up my stuff in the overhead locker I noticed both at them looking at me, so at least I had their interest. I took one of the pillows which were fortunately in my locker so that I could indicate an interest in just sleeping on the trip (I normally can't be bothered by guys trying to chat me up on planes).

After the obligatory meal and clearing of the trays, I got the pillow out, turned towards the guys to my left and pretended to go to sleep. But first I had made sure the wrap around blouse was so open that there was a clear view of my right breast, still fairly decently covered by the tube top. I found the end of the strings and settled down comfortably.

I pretended to try to get into a better position and pulled the string a little, feeling the top slide down, dangerously close to revealing the nipple. I left it there for perhaps five minutes while I pretended to sleep. The guy had his laptop out and was typing, but through my almost shut eyes I could tell he was occasionally stopping and glimpsing over at me. I could feel myself getting aroused at the thought of what I was about to do.

I closed my eyes completely, and next time he stopped writing I pulled the string a little more, intending the top to only clear the nipple. I clearly felt as the nipple popped out, feeling a little sorry knowing that it would get hard and showing some degree of excitement. I was afraid it would give me away. If I was asleep and not noticing the slip, I shouldn't be getting aroused by it. But perhaps he would just see it as a natural reaction to it being released like that, or perhaps he was imagining me having a sexual dream, sparked by the feeling of the exposed nipple. I didn't get to think about this for long, because I felt the top continuing down, even without me pulling the strings. I guess sitting in this position, with the breast squeezed a little, once the top cleared the nipple there was nothing to hold it up, and suddenly I felt if falling completely down revealing the entire breast and naked skin below it. I almost, as a normal reaction, reached up to put it back in place, but at the last moment I controlled myself. This was exactly the kind of excitement I had been planning, so why stop it just because it had gone a bit further than I had planned? I kept sitting there, suddenly conscious of the typing having completely stopped. I know he was sitting there staring at my bare breast, but hoping that it wasn't obvious to anybody else. To me the greatest satisfaction is when it is a kind of action only going on between me and one "innocent bystander".

I think I was sitting like that for perhaps five minutes, getting extremely aroused, even perhaps dozing of a bit on my dirty fantasies, when I suddenly felt a tap on my arm. I looked up, again controlling an urge to cover up. As I saw the guy staring straight at me and then down at my breast, I felt a surge in my stomach as about to experience a small orgasm from the excitement.

Leaving the hand on my arm, the guy spoke to me.

"I am sorry to wake you," he said. "It is just that I have been sitting here noticing your top falling down. Add as much as like what I see, I don't feel I can sit here with a clear consciousness and look at you without letting you know that your top has fallen down."

I pride myself in my talents as an actress, because I managed to blush and seem embarrassed as I looked down at myself, seeing how exposed I was and quickly pulling the top back up.

"Am am so sorry, I keep having trouble with that top, but didn't think anything would happen when I sat down," I lied fluently.

"Oh, I don't think you have anything to be sorry about. It is I who is sorry for taking so long time to let you know, but I have to admit, that I was enjoying the view too much, so I couldn't really get myself to warn you about it."

I managed to look suitably embarrassed and flattered at the same time.

"Thank you , I guess that was a compliment," I said with a smile as I settled down to go back to sleep. "Please let me know if it happens again, I mean, after you are finished looking."

I could have done it again to see how he reacted, but I thought I had had my fun, and I was quite happy to stop the conversation there. He smiled nicely at me as we got up, but no more was said. But I was quite pleased with myself for laying a plan which ended up working so well. The image in my mind of me waking up, catching his eyes on my breast, looking down and "discovering" the totally exposed breast, will stay with me for a long time.

Now that is the kind of small displays that really appeal to me. Hope you people out there don't find it too disgusting to have a woman behaving like this.

Hugs Jen

Developments

2007-09-12T08:24:00.000+02:00

There are many things happening in my life these days. I spend a week out of each month working in Spain. That should have given me lots of opportunity to write, but being alone down there, where it is still warm and nice, has given me so many opportunities to play with my exhibitionism, that I have been all caught up in that instead.

As an alternative to writing, which takes a more continous effort, I thought that perhaps I should use this blog for more discussions about exhibitionism. I have already had a reader share a story about his wife's exhibitionism, and I would like to invite more readers to share their experiences. Not only stories, if you think that takes too much effort, but also just small descriptions of things she does and that perhaps you encourage her to do. And should you be a woman reading this, and should you happen to share the same tendencies as I do, I would really love to hear from you. If you don't want to do it here on the public blog, then write me directly. I promise to reply to all such mails.

I will also start writing blogs about the small plays I play, or how I try to set up situation where I can do a bit of "accidental exposure". Perhaps it can work as an inspiration to others, both for trying out the same, and for writing about them here.

I know there are other forums for exhibitionists, but they cost money which means leaving your credit card and identity behind. I don't do this for money, so perhaps we can have a more open discussion here.

Hugs Jen

New story published

2007-07-29T17:41:00.000+02:00

My latest story, Prison Exposure, is now published on my home page.
www.asstr.org/~doalfer
Hugs Jen

New story on it's way

2007-07-18T14:10:00.000+02:00

I have sent my latest story "Prison exposure" to my editor. Hopefully I will be able to post it soon. Just thought I would let you know.
Hugs Jen

Why exhibitionist?

2007-07-08T13:20:00.000+02:00

I am going to write the answer to a recent e-mail question here as the reply might have a general interest (at least amongst some of my readers). Basically the question was "when and how I realised I had exhibitionist tendencies".

Even back in my teenage days I was well aware of the reaction that my looks and body had on guys. Probably more that my girlfriends who was just laughing embarrassed when the guys looked at them. I on the other hand didn't laugh, I just enjoyed the looks.

I remember a school trip to Holland at about the age of 15 or 16, when the boys wanted to play strip poker. We were all drunk and the group was one of good friends, some of whom had been going out with each other for a while, so most of us accepted the challenge. However, as we got to the point of loosing crucial parts of clothing some dropped out, but a number of us kept going.

At one point we were down to only three guys and two girls still in the game while the others watched. When the second guy lost the last peace of clothing the spectators applauded and whistled. I was getting aroused, and even though I was only down to panties and t-shirt with no bra, I was worried that my wet crotch would be obvious. When the other girl lost her bra, that was the first time the group actually got to see a pair of naked breasts. She was terribly embarrassed and tried to cover herself as much as possible. I had already decided that when it became my turn I wasn't going to do that, but would just try to act naturally. However, when I in the next two rounds lost both the t-shirt and then the panties, both the guys grew huge erections. I found it difficult to keep the detached attitude I had planned. The atmosphere was totally changed. Electrified, the spectators breathless. No more catcalls. I think everybody thought maybe we had gone too far. I however, was just so aroused from the way the two guys so obviously had become excited when I dropped my clothes, and not a little proud that it had happened when I exposed my breasts and not when the other girl did.

One of guys felt shy and tried to hide his erection while the other one just kept looking at me. He was obviously aware that I was as excited as he was, even though it didn't show as prominently. But I just couldn't help positioning myself in a way where he could look at my glistering wet pussy while I tried to keep from staring too obviously at his blue throbbing penis head oozing with moisture. When the other girl lost her panties she dropped them in a rush and ran out of the room with an embarrassed girlish scream. We all woke from the trance, got our clothes on and tried to behave as if nothing had happened. But I was really very much aware how excited I had become from the looks of the other two guys, not to mention the rest of the group which had been looking at us, silently observing the display.

All that happened in my teenage days. Everything was wild then, and I didn't actually click on to the fact that I might be any different than other girls. I knew some were more shy that I was, but I just thought that was natural. But I couldn't help reliving the scene in my head. The thought that they had all seen me totally naked was both embarrassing the exciting. I had been with several guys already, and I had enjoyed the way they looked at me when we were making love, but I hadn't expected that it would get me so excited thinking about innocent bystanders seeing me naked.

That is a dilemma that has haunted me all my life. When I am excited I love exposing myself, but afterwards I keep wondering what goes through the head of people having seen me. Are they imagining my tits being naked again when they are talking to me? I have discussed that with a friend of ours who has been in several porn movies. She says it doesn't bother her at all. It is like two different worlds which are perfectly separated. That is also what my husband Poul says about her. Even though he has not only seen her naked but also in very intimate situations blown up on the screen, he says that picture doesn't appear in his mind when he is talking to her. I guess it is a bit like meeting your ex at a dinner party some year later. You can have a perfectly normal conversation without thinking about all the times you have had sex.

I guess the time I really understood my feelings as an exhibitionist came at a time when a group of people at my dad's office where I worked had an opportunity to see pictures of me naked. It was totally unintentional, believe it or not. I had had a six month fling with a guy from my dad's office and in his summerhouse on the Spanish island of Mallorca he had taken a series of pictures of me getting more and more undressed and finally adopting several very exposing postures by the pool. The pictures were the last ten or so of a film showing my boyfriend racing his boat. One of the other crew members, who also worked in the office, had wanted to see the pictures of the race. I had removed the ones of me from the pile, but hadn't thought of the negatives. The guy wanting a copy of the pictures had taken the film to be developed and not knowing anything differently had had the whole film developed

One day when I entered the cafeteria at the office I saw a number of the guys looking up at me, laughing and making lewd comments. As I approached I saw all the pictures of me laid out on the table, some even blown up to A4 size. I stopped dead in my tracks, everybody looking at me mentally projecting the images of my naked body onto the image of me standing frozen to the spot trying to figure out what to do next. I decided against making a scene, or trying to collect the pictures. The damage had already been done, and now it was a question of saving face. I just looked at them as if they were naughty small boys, shook my head and turned around leaving as gracefully as I could.

But in the hall the reality hit me. All these guys had now seen me naked, and they would be remembering those pictures every time they saw me. But what surprised me the most was my own feelings. I was just so aroused! For weeks after that the mental pictures of their eyes undressing me as I stood there in the cafeteria, would get my juices flowing and my knees going weak.

It was after that realisation that I started to play with exposing myself. My attitude to sex got more daring and experimental. To date the number of times I have exposed myself more or less obvious cannot be counted. But the two times that come to my mind when I think back to the first occurrences are these two. And thinking about them can still get me excited!

I hope that gives some kind of an answer to the question.

Hugs Jen

Accidental Exposure

2007-06-26T12:29:00.000+02:00

Recently I have had a few mail exchanges regarding what I call Accidental Exposure (AE). What I mean with AE are situation where one is exposing oneself, but in situations where you can pretend that is was done by "accident". Examples are changing in changing rooms and being aware of the mirrors, positioning yourself so that people outside will see you in the mirror, but where you can pretend not to think about that possibility. It can be changing inside by a window with the net curtains pulled closed, "pretending" not to realise that when there is light on inside, even thought you can't see out, people outside can see in.

Unfortunately going braless is not really the fashion these days, but when it was it offered a lot of opportunity, like sitting at a bar, resting your elbows at the bar, knowing that your top would fall away from your front allowing a good side view of your breasts.

I have included many of such situations in my stories, and it seems to appeal to many of my readers as much as it does to me.

I would like to hear from people who have experiences of such situations. It can be both as the active part or as the observer. Even if perhaps you don't have any actual experiences then let me know what your fantasies are.

And please try to comment by writing the comment as a comment to this blog so other readers can benefit from the exchange of ideas and experiences.

Hugs Jen

Difference between men and women...

2007-05-19T12:13:00.000+02:00

I spend two hours on the road yesterday. The other day I had heard Poul discuss with a friend something about a girl they had seen on a TV show, and how they had found her very sexually attractive. Actually the friend had said, at a time he didn't think I heard it, that he was getting aroused every time he watched her. As I was driving I was pondering on the difference between what got men and women excited.

Why is it that a guy can get exciteed from seeing a girl in a magazine or in a show, and even if she is not particularly undressed, they can get aroused that easily? I don't think I would look twice if I saw a naked guy in a film or in a magazine. If he had a good body, tight butt or perhaps was well equipped, I might have a second look, but I wouldn't have to rush out to the bathroom with the magazine and relieve myself.

I need to feel a connection and a certain vibration between the guy and me to get excited. That is very hard to get from a magazine. Reading a good story or seeing a film may provide the kind of pseudo connection I need where I can imagine a situation that might get me excited. But it is the situation and the build-up to it that gets me excited, not a picture of some unknown guy on a nude beach or in a common sauna. Actually a limb dick is not particularly attractive and certainly cannot get me going the way a pair of boobs can get Poul going. Even in porn movies the sight of a dick can't get me excited. Usually the stories are so lame, the action so unbelievable and the focus on the penis in vagina 50% of the time, extremely boring if not off-putting. What on earth is it that gets the guys so interested in this?

One of the few times I can remember the sight of a dick exciting me was when I was a lot younger and shared a flat with a girlfriend. We had seperate rooms but shared bathroom and we normally walked around naked with no inhibitions. One morning, just out of the shower I walked into her room to get my hair drier which she alway used and never put back. Being slightly annoyed that I had to go and get it again I just stomped into her room, stark naked, to find her bend over her table being taken from behind by some guy she must have come home with during the night without me noticing.

I guess it was just a natural reaction that he pulled out of her. But then we all froze just staring at each other. It was probably no more than just 5 seconds, but it felt like half a minute. I remember just staring as his large, wet and shiny dick poiting at somewhere between my friend and me and didn't even think of covering myself or looking away. I was just like a cat in the headlight of a car. Frozen. Finally my friend unfroze and cried out for me to get the hell out, which I finally did.

She was with the guy for a couple of weeks and it was always a bit strained when he and I were there together. But the thought of that large shiny dick, and me standing there naked in full view, has given me quite a few arousals and subsequent reliefs.

However last month when we were in a sauna in Germany and at other times in Helsinki I have experienced guys getting more or less erect from watching me or some of the other girls present without it doing anything for me.

I am working on a short story prompted by a recent experience which involved guys masturbating. That on the other hand is one thing which can get me going, especially if I know they do it because of me. Let me share a small incident with you which illustrate what I mean.

In the private hospital that I work for we also have a fertility clinique. One of my friends work down there, and I was down talking to her about the plans for a party we were organising. She was at the desk helping guys who had to go and produce a load for later use in inseminating their partner. I wasn't really paying attention, because of the intimacy of the act the whole thing was deliberately kept very professional. Apparently one of they guys who had come to the counter to pick up the container needed for storage of the semen had previously had trouble producing the required load so when he managed this time my friend praized him and said that he obviously managed to conjure op the necessary images in his head. He smiled, looked at me and said he had no problems this time, he was just imagining being with me! That was totally inappropriate, but I just blushed like a teenager and smilingly commented that I was glad to be of some use. He turned and left me standing shaking, my knees going wobbely, nipples exploding, feeling as aroused as in the middle of a hot encounter. My friend laughed and nothing further was said. But I was so hot for the rest of the day thinking about how he had been masturbating while dreaming about me.

Isn't is strange the things that excites us? If you feel like sharing similar experiences, especially if you are a woman, I would love to hear more from you. Preferably as comments to this post, but else by e-mail.

Looking forward to hear what gets you going,

Hus Jen

Status update

2007-05-19T11:59:00.000+02:00

I know I said I would get back with more information on the dress and the experiences I had with it during our trip to the conferences. However, that will have to wait a little longer. A few things has happened in the meantime which has taken my time away from this project.

We have bought a flat in Spain. There are quite a number of Danes, not to mention other Scandinavians and Brits, who have lumped themself together in rather large communities. That means enough, relatively well to do people in one area, who are potential patients for a private hospital. The hospital I work for most of the time, when I am not helping Poul at his clinique, has got the go-ahead from the Spanish authorities, and have taken over a local hospital, and turned it into a private hospital, mostly targeting the non-spanish community in the area.

They will sign-up the patients who will need my expertise and give them appointments or assign them to a bed if that is needed, at times that will suit me, so that I may go down there for perhaps a week at a time. The cost of a decent hotel for the number of nights I will be there will be more than the cost of having our own flat, which we can also use for holidays and lend out to friends when I don't need it.

What does that mean to my readers? I don't know yet. Either I will be so busy that I don't get much time to write, or I will have evening in the flat where I can write in peace. Time will show.

But for now, all the arrangements have taken all available time (apart from the next entry into the blog, which I will write later today).

Hugs Jen - and thanks for your interest in my life and your friendly communications.

On-line again

2007-04-10T13:21:00.000+02:00

I am back after two major conferences, one in Munich and one in the Philippines plus some sightseeing in between. Have a ton of work waiting for me, and I need that cleared before I can continue writing. Will however, be back with information regarding my dress and some of the experiences it triggered, and eventuelly I will continue the Castle Experience story. But for now the backlog is growing hour by hour.
Hugs Jen

Off-line

2007-03-19T12:44:00.000+01:00

Thank you so much to all of you who have written to me either as a comment on my writing or with suggestions for dress.
I will be so busy the next days before leaving, and will then be away until mid April. I will however get back to all those who wrote, and with a final decision on the dress and any experiences I might have with it once I am back from my trip.
Till then - hugs,
Jen

Suggestions for dresses

2007-03-14T09:45:00.000+01:00

I have already got a couple of interesting suggestions. I didn't know such dresses could be found in the internet. Unfortunately none of them are ideal, but they could give me inspiration and I have forewarded the sites to my dressmaker.

Here are the links I got:
A whole dress (if you can call that for "whole"):
http://www.eroticlothing.co.uk/acatalog/pp8315.jpg

For top:
http://www.hotfash.com/ProductImageGallery.asp?ProductID=3934&GalleryItem=1

For skirt:
http://www.hotfash.com/ProductImageGallery.asp?ProductID=3590&Page=3

Please keep them coming.

Hugs Jen

Help me choose my dress!

2007-03-12T14:37:00.000+01:00

I need help choosing a dress for a convention formal party and disco. Please go to my home page and read the requirements. Do you have any ideas? Any pictures I can use and give to the dressmaker? I have only a few weeks left, so please hurry. www.asstr.org/~doalfer.

Hugs Jen

Writing is testing limits

2007-03-11T10:35:00.000+01:00

I am working on the continuation of Castle Showdown. But I am finding it slow going. The problem is that I am not quite sure about my own feelings on the subject. Writing is an interesting way to play with your own limits. Normally when you fantasize or dream of something, if it becomes a bit unpleasant, you can just redirect your dream. But if you write you have to continue the story line (or go back and do a major rewrite). In this case I have announced that I intend the continue the story in a swinging club. That is really a thought experiment, as I have never had any experiences of that kind. I can imagine the setting and the build up, but what is it going to be like to actually submit yourself fully to the situation? I don't mind a bit of petting at parties. I can also accept a situation involving swapping of partners. or a bit of "public" sex. But what is it going to be like with people you don't know? With any number of people as potential unlookers not to mention participants?

I keep stopping my writing having to re-think the situation and see what actually appeals to me. What would I do if the situation was real? Some situations I find arousing to think about and some quite revolting. I really only want to write about the onces I find acceptable, but perhaps all the time balancing on the brink of the unacceptable, to find out where that line is.

So, I am afraid, the continuation will be at least a couple of months down the road. Also because I have to go to two conventions combined with some vacation over the next month, which will make it practically impossible to write. But one day it will be there - I promise.

Hugs Jen

Other writers

2007-03-08T13:23:00.000+01:00

I thought I would have a look at some of the other writers at litterotica to check out the quality of their stories. I am not very much into reading other people's stories, but thought I might perhaps get some inspiration. However, I was so disappointed. Most of the stoires are not only badly written, they are totally unbelievable. They are so obviously some guy's dirty fantasy, mostly about his ability to seduce girls with no trouble at all. Or husbands whose wifes parade around fucking all kinds of other guys in sight. There is no build-up and no story line and very little conversation. I don't know if guys gets turned on by this, but I can tell you not only did it not do anything for me, I found most of them off-putting. Even the ones which received the best ratings, didn't do anything for me. Maybe I have to be more select in what writers I read or what subject lines or codes I search for. I will have another go later, but if anybody has some suggestions for how to find good quality stories, please let me know.

Hugs Jen

Republishing old stories

2007-03-07T14:34:00.000+01:00

I am trying to establish a presence at www.literotica.com to expand my number of potential readers. I have submitted my latest story Castle Showdown for publication, but felt that I might just as well put some more stories there. So I dug out my very first story The Changing Room and submitted that for publication. Unfortunately they are not so quick at accepting entries so it may be a couple of days before any of them emerge. I will however keep posting my stores there so eventually they should all be there as well as on my site.

Hugs Jen

Introduction to my blog

2007-03-07T13:50:00.000+01:00

If you have come here it is probably because you have read some of my stories on the net. I am going to try this medie as a way of communicating with my readers. Some of you will have read my publishing diary, my FAQ or may have been exchanging e-mails with me. However, quite often readers will ask questions of a general interest, and I have needed a way to get my replies out to a broader audience.

I will use this site as a place for information regarding new stories, thoughts and responce to readers. I have found that my stories are listed on many sites, so people may not be used to go to my home page for information, so perhaps this will work better. At least it is worth a try.

Hugs Jen